I have always wanted to be a mother. Growing up, I never wanted a career...I just wanted to be a mom. When Zach and I got married, we knew that we wanted to start a family quickly. After 2 months of trying, we found out that we were expecting our first child on July 3, 2011.
I had been feeling different for about a week before and thought I might be pregnant. I had a superhuman sense of smell, sore breasts, cramping, strange cravings, and just a weird feeling. I had taken several tests and they had all come back negative, but I was a few days late and just not convinced. I talked Zach into stopping by Wal-Mart on the way home from church, and as soon as we got home, I ran to the bathroom. Before I even put the cap back on the test, 2 lines showed up. I immediately started crying and yelling for Zach. He came in from the kitchen with a bowl of buffalo chicken dip still in his hands. I kept saying "It's positive! We're going to have a baby!". My sweet, overwhelmed husband grabbed the test, kissed me, and then asked about the best way for him to heat up the leftover dip.
I immediately felt different. I kept looking at my stomach and thinking, "There is a life inside of me!". The first person I called was my sister...I couldn't wait to share our life-changing news. Two days later we shared the news with the rest of our families. It was so exciting to tell them they were going to be grandparents. I felt so blessed and honored to be pregnant. I was filled with hope and excitement about how my life was changing. I think I had the same worries as any mother, but I never fathomed that 9 and 1/2 months later I would be burying my daughter.
